How do you turn a house into a real home? Well, it’s not the structure, painting colors, or overall theme that’s responsible; it’s the people and their memories that create a good home. Just as saying goodbye to an old home might evoke a roller-coaster of bittersweet emotions, moving into a new place can light a spark in your imagination of the future.
It’s no surprise that people like to envision how their families will build a life and create memories inside those walls before building a new home. After all, creating a home together is as much an act of intimacy as it is about dabbling in finances and other logistics.
If you’re building a home for the first time, it’s likely that you’re confused about what to expect. Don’t worry; this guide will be about teaching you how to let the imagination soar so that your humble abode lays the foundation for success in life.
So, shall we begin?
How to envision memories before laying the first brick
- Talk to your family and understand their perspectives
Designing, decorating, and using space might seem easy on paper, but the reality is quite different. Believe it or not, none of our implicit expectations can turn out to be right. You go for one thing and later find out that your partner is dissatisfied with the way the house-building process is evolving or what’s been already completed.
Since constructing a home is an act of intimacy, it’s crucial that you don’t stick to any assumptions. Explicitly communicate with your spouse and embrace their opinions, ranging from choice in color and the bathroom designs, to cabinet layout and overall budget. Take time to figure out what’s significant to each of you truly; don’t assume that your partner gets it.
- Share all the fantasies with your partner or future self about your soon-to-be home
We all have them, but few only dare to share fantasies, even with their spouse. But if you’re going to build a home together, you might as well get talking out loud. Don’t hesitate to ask questions about the kind of house your partner would love, what they might hate, and what kind of place they grew up in?
Don’t hold back your imagination and let them run free. Ask yourself the following questions:
- Where would you like to read a book together, or alone?
- Where is the place that would be ideal for listening to some music?
- Do you need a room dedicated to practicing your music skills?
- Where does the window need to be so that you can get a good view of the surroundings?
- What will your bedroom feel like?
- How far or close should the kid’s room be from your bedroom?
- Do either of you need separate spaces for work, or just to relax?
- How will the main entertainment room feel like?
- How will the room where you entertain your guests feel like?
- Do you intend to modify decorations or extend the housing project anytime soon?
These questions are only the tip of the iceberg, and we are sure that you have much more that match with your needs.
- Work as a team. Always!
Remember: A home is not just about you. Just like a relationship, starting a new home is about collaborating and negotiating; giving and taking. Your sanctuary can truly become what you envision it to be only if you follow a process that acknowledges and respects each other’s similarities and differences.
In a way, we can say that how you build your home plays a great role in how your relationship or marriage works out. Just like not having a fulfilling sexual life can build up resentment, not letting your partner have a say in creating a home will haunt you for the rest of the days. Can you imagine living in a place where nothing is of your choosing?
Not a single piece of furniture of your loving is there? How will you ever find comfort or peace in a place like that? It’s essential that a couple puts forward the best team skills, the best home builders in the home building process. These skills, by the way, will help you rescue the marriage time and again.
- Creative brainstorming for the win!
You may not be good at brainstorming, but there are plenty of magazines, articles, and books you can read to master that skill. A skill that is number 1 to have for most couples. Keep these basic components in mind: lay down all your ideas on the table, there is no judging involved; inspire, ask questions, and play the devil’s advocate with patience and a smile.
You can also invest some time and resources into technology that might help your spouse get an insight into your visions and how to better implement them. Collect pictures while you progress with research and lay them all down on the table as well. Sit together, look through those pictures, and imagine as if you’re browsing a website for the best ideas.
- Compromise. Compromise. Compromise.
Okay, maybe three ‘compromises’ were a bit of an exaggeration, but you cannot rule out this aspect of building a house IF you are married or are in a relationship. At the end of the day, no two people are alike, and when it comes to making major decisions, there is bound to be some conflict – like it or not.
Coming to a compromise is a skill that will be put to the test when you’re planning to build a house, so you better prepare for it. Always keep in mind that your partner’s wishes are as valid as yours and you both have to find the balance to live in harmony.
Final thoughts
Our homes serve as a respite from the chaos of the outer world. So, be it your home is a colonial on Cul De Sac or a small cabin in the woods, following the advice on this guide will serve you exceptionally well. The thought of building your first home can be both exciting and frightening; this write-up was our effort to make it a little more of the former.